The former half-term and current half-wit announces that she will not be a candidate for president in 2012. Of course, her stated reasons are obtuse, fully illogical, and completely fail to obscure the truth: namely, that she is the biggest farce ever to be foisted onto the American political stage, nearly a heart-beat away from the Oval Office, complete with her delusional self-image and cellular-level narcissism.
Since she thinks that she will be able to affect more change as a supporter on the outside of the race, my fondest wish is that, perhaps emboldened, the Republican establishment will now summon up the courage to request, kindly or otherwise, that she promptly disa-fucking-ppear.
This news also comes on the same day as we hear of the passing of Steve Jobs, a visionary genius and timeless hero of American business, an icon, and a representative of the very best of what America is. The announcement of his death will, thankfully, result in much larger headlines, many more words of praise from all walks of life, from Twitter, Facebook, Google+, blogs like this, news sites, news stations, and newspapers all over the world, than anything that Palin could ever have dreamed of. In the 24-hour news cycle, it took exactly as long as it takes you to read this sentence to move on from her announcement to the next story. And that's what most of us have wanted since the day she defiled our national politics in August 2008.