I Wish I'd Written This

Sent by a reader, it's clever and original at the same time.

The final word in health and nutrition...

After an exhaustive review of the research literature, here's the final word on nutrition and health:

1. Japanese [people] eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
3. Chinese [people] drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
5. Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.

CONCLUSION:

• Eat and drink whatever you like.
• Speaking English is apparently what kills you, and the U.S. Government is trying to correct that problem.